What 8 Cartoon Characters Have To Say About Alcohol

[tps_header]When you think about cartoon characters, sometimes you think about some of the classics: Fred Flintstone, George Jetson, and Popeye.  However, there are other cartoon characters that remind you of that crazy guy that got wasted at your daughter’s 3rd birthday party.  I’m sure when they were coming up with the idea for these characters, that wasn’t exactly the picture they had in mind.  Anyways, these guys are absolutely hilarious for some of the references they make about booze.  Here are some of our favorites:[/tps_header]

Homer Simpson from The Simpsons

• Ah, good ol’ trustworthy beer. My love for you will never die.
• Does whisky count as beer?
• Alright Brain, you don’t like me, and I don’t like you. But lets just do this, and I can get back to killing you with beer.
• Homer no function beer well without.
• I like my beer cold, my TV loud and my homosexuals flaming.
• Oh no! What have I done? I smashed open my little boy’s piggy bank, and for what? A few measly cents, not even enough to buy one beer. Wait a minute, lemme count and make sure … not even close.

[tps_title]Barney Gumble From The Simpsons[/tps_title]

• Mayday, mayday! The engine room has sprung a leak! It’s filling up with a clear, non-alcoholic liquid!
• Man, that’s classic compulsive behavior. Wow, free beer!
• Hey, Homer, I’m worried about the beer supply. After this case, and the other case, there’s only one case left.
• What kind of pathetic drunk do you take me for? Somebody spilled beer in this ashtray!
• I’m Barney Gumble, and I’m an alcoholic.
• What do you mean I forgot my birthday? How could I forget- [chugs a beer glass]- my own birthday?

[tps_title]Peter Griffin From Family Guy[/tps_title]

• Oh, I thought you wanted us to murder the children and harvest their organs for beer money.
• Now that’s not true! I can also vomit, fall down and make dirty calls to your sister when I’m drunk!
• Now kids, Daddy only drank so the Statue of Liberty would take her clothes off.
• C’mon, let’s go drink ’til we can’t feel feelings anymore.
• Wow, it’s like I’ve died and went to heaven. But then they realized it wasn’t my time yet. So they sent me to a brewery.

[tps_title]Brian Griffin From Family Guy[/tps_title]

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• I’m not drunk, all right. I just have a speech impediment … and a stomach virus … and an inner ear infection.
• Whose leg do you have to hump to get a dry Martini around here?
• You know just because you guys sung for some drunkards at a karaoke bar, doesn’t mean you have talent.
• I didn’t know there was going to be an open bar. And the guy really knew his stuff! He made me a mojito. I don’t think it’s a gay drink. Mo-ji-to…

[tps_title]Stewie Griffin From Family Guy[/tps_title]

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• I think you…are a special person….now now now…come on…I’m being…I’m being serious…for…for a second…are…are you gonna listen to me? Are you gonna listen to me…so I…can tell you that I respect you?
• I’m tired and I want to go to bed. Everybody! I’m drunk and I wanna go to bed. Just the women!
• Oh I feel so delightfully white trash. Mommy, I want a mullet.
• Hm, the end result of a drunken back-seat grope-fest and a broken prophylactic?

[tps_title]Randy Marsh From South Park[/tps_title]

• Touch my nose to my finger? That’s impossible.
• I have some beer to keep my buzz going!
• What Seems to be to the Officer, problem?

[tps_title]Bender From Futurama[/tps_title]

• Life is about decisions. Make the wrong ones and you’ll wind up face down in a pool of your own blood and urine.
• Hey. What kind of party is this? There’s no booze and only one hooker.  This is the worst kind of discrimination. The kind against me.
• In order to fix your leaky roof I’ll need to spend two or three hours down here in the wine cellar.
• I hate partying. If only I didn’t have so much crunk in my ba-dun-ka-dunk!
• Hey. What kind of party is this? There’s no booze and only one hooker.

[tps_title]Roger From American Dad[/tps_title]

• (excited about Stan’s fancy new drink) Oh my god, what is this and how can I replace my blood with it?
• I need a drink. Where’s the booze?
• Oh, Ernest and Julio Gallo, you make a glorious wine, and a handsome couple!
• God! Who do you have to probe around here to get a Chardonnay?
• Nooo! It’s Sammy Hagar’s Jagermeister! Haygermeister!

[tps_footer]What are some of your favorite drinking quotes from cartoons?  Drop them in the comments below![/tps_footer]